On independance and the Matrix theory of creation.

Yeah, scary title, ain't it? But it gets about what I've been doing for the last two days or so. I know, basically, have that apartment. (A reason I don't think the universe is against me). All I have to do is drop off the deposit, what's left for this month's rent, and pick up the key (of course putting my stuff in there). It's an amazing thing really. I'm afraid of what's going to happen, in a base level, and yet I am livid with all of the opportunities that will open up... An astonoshing thing, even though it has appeared periodically for almost three years... But that means that I'll be happier, unless something bad happens, of course. And then there's that whole food thing...

But as for the latter part of the headline, I'll get to that in a little bit. But first a quote that I feel needs to be shared:

"A promise is all about faith.
It's only as strong as your faith in your own self,
in your own God."

Yeah, I pulled that out of a book that my dad got for my mom that had a lengthy version of the song "I hope you dance." with it. Most of the stuff in the book was inspiring and poetic, but I knew most of it or had read it elsewhere. That, though, speaks to the current events and sometimes I just want a plane so that I can paper the town with my messages. The reason people break their own promises is because they don't have faith in themsleves and those around them. That's what that says to me. I have absolute certainty about who I am, I don't lie to myself or others to cover up who I am. But those who do never have faith in others or in themselves. I know, they told me that was why. But to put it into it's inspiring context, the rest of that poem goes on to say that making a promise is a beautiful thing because it shows how much faith you have. I didn't like that. I think that KEEPING your promises shows how much all of that means to you. I could make promises all day and never mean them, and people do that to me all of the time. But my word is my bond and I do everything that I can do to keep from breaking that. Whether you do it or not is your afair, just don't expect me to appreciate being lied to.

But anyways, I had a bit of epiphany yesterday while on the road back up here, and it comes about a little from multiple theories of why people are here, etc. And the title comes about because of the fact that I grabbed some of it from the second Matrix movie. But I'm going to maintain that a lot of what's philisophically moving from that trillogy was in my mind beforehand. They just made it awesome... But the point is a unifying theme between the themes of our celestial bodies being in heaven before we're born, and our corporeal bodies, and then going back up again (more or less, and definately more complex than that). In essence, we are spirits before we're born, and to keep it simple I'm going to try and simplify as much as possible. Basically, during that time we are preparing to be here. We are given, if you will, a bank card/score card/whatever for which to prepare. You basically use this in determining who you are going to be from what you look like, all the way to what desicions you would make and your personality. Enter the theory of Destiny and Choice: Matrix put forth an interesting idea, that you have already made your choice and now you're just trying to understand it (the Oracle), but this also encompasses the theory of destiny being that your path has already been paved for you. It essentially encompasses what I've always thought which is that you are your destiny. The path has to be laid out because if God knows all things, then he knows what you're going to do: Destiny. BUT!! God gives fee will and allows you to choose your own: Choice. Thus if we choose beforehand, we estabilish our destiny, and then we are sent to Earth to see how well we chose. Now me, being a fan of combining ideas from multiple religions to see how they fit, bring up the theory of re-incarnation and this whole scenario. And esentially I still just have theories, but that's what they are, and I'm not sure how they relate via the texting going on here. But I had to write it down somewhere...

Anyways, I do hope your mind exploded with the sudden insight, I know mine did (it was rather messy...)

I'll post later at some point from my apartment and let you know how things are going there. I know you're all livid with anticipation.

Did you notice that I used livid three times in this post? Exciting, isn't it...