"What are you doing?!"

"What are YOU doing?"

"That is correct! That is correct!"

If you are lost, prepared to join me on a quest to be even lost-er.

'Cause I've been hanging out there for a while now.

You wanted to hear from me? But what's the fun in that? I feel like acting like a spoiled brat for a while, and why should you want to hear from one of those?

I've slipped again, all better tomorrow? All better after this post? I don't know.

Wanting friends that won't want me. Staying away from the ones that want me that I don't want. Why can't I have at least ONE where it's both at the same time?

I don't mean to single anyone out, I'm not here to hurt feelings, there are multitudes that fit into these categories. Seriously. Most of my "friends" are people that I like, that I wouldn't mind hangning out with that it alwyas seems awkward to do so, or they end up shunning me and somehow still being friendly.

It's not a unique thing to do by any stretch of the imagination...

I'm sorry. Apparently I'm going to be an asshole for a few mins.

...

I've now had TWO events that have made me want to puke during a debate... One I had with my Physics teacher last year who actually made me want to hate debate, and the other is 116 posts of circular logic and just as round debating styles on my ol' history teacher's blog.

I found something to agree with one of the opposite contenders, for once, but after 80+ posts having gone by, I decided not to interject such pointless baloney into a pointless debate...

...

I think I've figured out that I DO actually need a life. I think that's what gets me most of the time. I'm on the verge of thinking about having wanting a life, but I don't do it. I can do it, I would do it, but I don't do it. I already know, and have known forever, where the blame lies, but there's something there that stops it.

I think at some point in the near future you might see me do something crazy, like get my license. Watch out world!

...

I got a new toy, again, but this one's just kinda a trinket. It's a battery-less flashlight (yeah, again, but I lost the other one during the Cali. trip...), but it also has an AM/FM radio. Pretty decent sound quality, too.

...

Speaking of quality, I finally was able to go through some of the magazines that I've been getting; Popular Science namely, and found a wicked cool wireless router for $160 that accomodates a 600 MB/s wireless rate and has 3-4 times the range of a regular router. Please note that it's about 11 times as fast as a standard router to date and not all that much more expensive.

I think that will be my next toy, we might actually be having a couple of people help pay for it so that we can get a couple of HOUSES (note the plurality) wirelessly enabled. Wicked cool.

...

There, we've heard from me. Doesn't really seem worth it somehow. I'm just finding myself in that "Hey, if I get everyone to look away, I can disappear!" moment, I know it's a lie (I've got too many damned responsibilities now, people'd be like "WTF, there's something that should have been done that's missing... Wierd."), but it's still a passing thought.

...

I need to get out of the house more than once or twice a month. I guess that's sort of what tomorrow's for. I'm looking forward to it, but more for the stuff that I'm NOT going for... Lol, I'm supposed to be going to help someone study for a test, but I'm obviously more interested in borrowing some games, pulling down his MP3 database and troubleshooting his technical woes... See, spoiled brat, selfish, and so on.

...

Not to mention I have my head up my ass apparently. Sorry, a relic from the "debate" that makes me want to vomit. I think it's the first time that I have been referred to in that matter. We all know that I'm close minded after all (thank you M. for calling me THAT for the first time in my life!). Not to mention that it was also in a debate. Sheesh. And then a coupla posts later I actually find something to agree with, what a world.

...

Things can become simpler at any time now... I feel like I'm going to pop, but I'm tired and venting a coupla weeks frustration apparently. I'm going to go drool at airgonetworks.com for a few mins at a router that beckons to me. I should feel better then, right?

Maybe...

So positive today, too.

I'll be my usual, charming, head-up-my-ass, self tomorrow, or else!