"They came... from... behind!"

I suppose now I should be able to rest easy.

Not often these days that I get a confirmation long overdue.

The only burden I have left is to swallow this and move on.

I don't want to lash out, I don't want to get even or make guilty or do the human thing. The normal thing.

Though every muscle in my body is tensed as though to strike again, I am more willing to let the remorse take over as it did last time I was in a similar situation. It is pretty much ending the same as always.

Maybe it was fate, maybe it's a pattern of my life.

The only comment that I feel I need to make is that all I have ever really wanted was a strong friendship that you afforded everyone but me. A strong friendship that is the same as I offer to everyone else.

Don't know why that was so hard. Guess I never will.

It's the same hope I still hold. To have your friendship, but now even more so it is in your hands. Never doubt that it was anywhere else. If there ever was a doubt, that is nothing I will take credit for.

I'm even less apt to seek anything else out then ever now. Not going to cut myself off, but certainly not going to present myself as a target.

Remorse indeed.

The thoughts of picking up and moving off again.

I can go on an bemoan many things, but there is no point, no cause and no reason.

I shall carry on as I have before.

Such an irony of my life.

I regret that things have turned out the way that they have, but more so regret the path that they started down in the first place.

It doesn't matter. I don't believe that you will come here anymore or even choose to associate with me anymore.

That is also fine.

For those of you that don't deserve to read this or be affected by it, realize that this is my sanctum first. And it's 12:30 AM.

I appologize for any negative feelings derrived from these words. I am seeking to get mine out. If you feel you need a cause for negativity such as I can, I will be happy to accomodate.

I'm leaving now before I break my bonds.