Thursday, December 20, 2007

"You don't understand the power of the darkside!"

I don't think you really, truly, quite understand.

You scoff.

You say you do.

You say so many things.

But what is it that you do understand?

There's a great deal that not even I understand, did you know that?

I think, or thought, about so many things, things beyond the norm and outside of society.

I slink through life, but I make many waves in my silent passing.

I'm not darkness incarnate, or the light.

I am both, I am twilight.

You are rainbow.

Broken light.

I don't think you really, truly, quite understand.










I am a shadow in life. I sneak about it doing things that are unnoticed but true.

Nothing is more true in my life other than myself. I do things that I feel are right, or just feel.

I think things that are my own, I speak only my words and I live only my life.

Excuse me for not being able to do otherwise, excuse me for not being able to live their life, or her life or his life.

I've tried, and believe me I would if I could, but I would be living my life through their bodies and even still I am not able to.

Not anymore than I can just turn off one thing and you can turn on another.

I'm beginning to see that I am not a person that you can be shy around.

You're not allowed to be embarrassed, or feel hurt when teased.

I'm like a supernova, unheard, but seen and destructive beyond reason.

Sometimes I don't even see what I have done.

But you can't stop it.

You can't just say "Don't be so bright."

You can't just say "Don't be so destructive."

I can't just say "Don't be so empathic."

It is what we are and we can't change it, but we can co-exist. We just need to see the reasons.

Make the effort.

Feel the love.

You want to know what I think and hear what I say, but I don't believe you.

I call you liar.

You like the idea of me sharing thoughts with you.

You like the idea of me agreeing with you and sharing something special.

But we're not meant to always agree.

It's normal.

It's natural.

It's love.

I have tiptoed around and I find that it stunts my growth.

I'm shorter because of it.

In more ways than one...

In a time where I'm trying to find myself, I can't make more concessions.

I'm a fighter, not a crier.

I need to make a stand.

I need to think.

I need to fight.

All of the fight has been taken out of me and it finds a new home where it's not wanted.

It's bad.

I don't ask you to change, but if you are going to be sensitive, be sensitive to me as well.

We're being a little one sided to be in this important of an alliance.

More than two lives and two hearts are at stake here.

I will love you to the end if you will only love me too, all that I am, and all that I will never hurt you.



++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

I realized something and I need you not to kill me...

I just want to talk, I don't want anything else.

What's My Age Again?

Want to know what I'm thinking?

What's My Age Again?

Iris.

Pinch Me.

This is what I'm thinking. This is who I am today.

Let me know when you figure it out.